WomanZie

EQUALITY IN HOUSEHOLD CHORES

09:13

“I am writing for the #ShareTheLoad activity at BlogAdda.com in association withAriel.”

“Sharing is Loving”

I am 28, I am a professional and I am married. My husband and I share a good rapport, but when it comes to sharing household chores I am quite lucky. He is a modern age man who does not feel shy to share the household work with me. I must say, he is a great cook and after office, he spends more time in the kitchen helping me in cutting vegetables, washing the utensils and cooking. It is good to see him cooking because he is a foodie and me too and when I am bored with my cooking, he is there to help me out. The good thing is that when he is in the kitchen, I can look after the laundry and cleaning of the house at weekends. Trust me, it saves our time and we spend quality time in the evening.

Are you jealous? Well, it is not your fault if your man is not helping you in the household chores. After all, we live in India and we are blessed with patriarchal ideology. 90% of men love to give orders to their wives and the “Sati Savitri” women are ready to oblige the orders of their “Pati Parmeshwar”. Thanks, that my husband belongs to that 10% who understand the equality in household chores and never leave me alone with washing, cleaning, laundry and cooking. India’s social custom did not allow the men to work at home and if they do so they are called “ladies”. It is a sick mentality, but it is changing slowly because of the nuclear family concept. Most couples live in metropolitan cities because of work commitments and at the end of the day doing these household chores give them the time to spend together and exchange sweet words.

Don’t you think sharing the household chores is a good idea? Most importantly, it will help you come closer to your partner both psychologically and physically. After a tiring day, a sweet smile of your spouse will fix your spoil mood and increase the level of happy hormone. In fact, the household chores make you active and fit and you can overcome the drowsiness. I know, society does not take this matter in a good way and not even your in-laws. But, it is the understanding between you and your partner that will strengthen your relationship and everyone will understand automatically. To me, there should be equality in household chores and share a good bond as a happy married couple.

A weekend trip to siliguri

10:57

Last week we went to Siliguri, West Bengal. It is our hometown and much needed break for me and my husband. For last 3 months my mother-in-law and father-in-law is staying with us in Kolkata. So, it is really very hard for us to find ‘couple times’ as we both have our work commitments plus household duties. I leave for office at 9.00 A.M and return home at 8 pm and after that I had to take care of the household chores, cook for my family and take care of the entire family including my brother-in-law who works in TCS and stay with us in Kolkata.

It was November last year that I met with my parents and visited Siliguri. It was my inner frustration that exploded on my husband and finally he decided to take me to Siliguri for a small vacation. I was very happy and finally relaxed to spend some time with my husband. We book our tickets for last Friday and we came back to Kolkata on Monday morning. It is an overnight journey from Kolkata to Siliguri. I was very happy and was like the top of the world. We shared lots of words with each other and it was a very soul satisfying for both of us.

Unfortunately, our journey was late by four hours and we reached Siliguri in the afternoon. But, that does not matter when you are coming close to your roots, parents and love. After we reached, we visited our house and then reached my parents house and finally took rest there. We were lucky to taste the delicious dishes made by MAA and all of us speak out our heart to the fullest after so many months. In the evening, we are all ready to visit my uncle’s house and they were overwhelmed as it was my first visit with husband after marriage. I and my sister talks a lot and it seems that the discussions are endless.

After the visit, my husband and I went to the market for some street shopping in my Scooty and suddenly there was a hailstorm, wind blowing heavily and it was raining cats and dogs. We took a shelter in a shop. Due to heavy storms, there was no electricity and when the rain finally stops, we came back home. We enjoyed candle light dinner at home and it was little freezing outside. Overall, the feeling was just awesome after a long time.

Image Source_Google

After a long time, I slept in my room and all my childhood memory flashes in front of eyes. Immediately, I share some of my sweet little memories with my husband and most sweetly he listened to each of my words and was taking part in the communication with interest. Next day, we head out to Sukna in our Scooty, it is a place near Siliguri. The chill breeze and the hillside river completes our day and make the trip refreshing like never before.

Hillside River

Did you like my post? Please share because sharing is caring… So, when are you planning your weekend trip?

Facts of Life

Anger....to Control

10:05

As soon as we react, we become slaves. A man blames me,
and I immediately react in the form of anger.
A little vibration which he created made me a slave.
—Swami Vivekananda

I cannot believe, I was away from my blog for such a long time. During this long gap I faced many situations in my life and today, I will share one such situation with all my readers.

Anger is not an emotion...It is an entity that grows instantly when something goes wrong with us. I share a quote of Swami Vivekananda which says that anger makes you a slave of a person who creates vibration in your life. Showing anger in a situation is not a wise decision. it can ruin your Present, Future and all your relationships around you.

If you are angry with someone or with any situation, then controlling your mind is a major step that you have to take in your life. You have to win the world with love and happiness and not with anger.

In the past, my anger forces me to react in a situation and this reaction lead to negative things. Right now, I am a person with full confidence who can control my anger in any situation and handle heated situation more confidently

I work on my anger and realized that it is better to Response than to React. Both are different from each other and if you understand the difference, then you can easily cope up your anger.

When a heated situation arise and someone who is close to you says a sentence or word that hurts you, then you must give a response to the situation and avoid the heated words. Reaction to the heart breaking words or sentence can worse the situation more and hamper your relationship.

Ideologies of two people in a discussion can never be same and that is why you should have control in your words and points of the discussion. Whenever I face heated conversation, I try to response in the situation or in worst case I walk out from the conversation.

If you stop the conversation for a small time, then you can have more valid point to say and take more rational decision on the topic.

This is not an one time activity, but it is a practice. After all, "practice makes a man perfect".
I can assure you that it is tough, but nothing is impossible in our life...

Share your story with me if you have overcome your anger. Looking forward to hear from you for your positive change....

Facts of Life

Marriage: Differences are the Compliments

09:37

Today, my marriage has become 6 months old and first heart touching words I heard from my husband is “You look tough outside, but actually you are soft inside… like a Coconut”

I pounce back “Me a Coconut”…errrrrrrrrr. But, jokes apart, I truly smiled inside that how a new person in my life understands me so well. I think that is why it is called BETTER HALF.

These 6 months are really the happening phase of my life. When a girl enters into a new family as the bride, she has many responsibilities. Didn’t I sound stereotypical? I cannot help because even my parents teach me these words. But, clapping with one hand is not possible. So, responsibilities come from both ends. That is where; my husband opens his arms for me. It takes time to understand a new family, the strength of a family and most importantly shortfalls of the family.

Every girl is an individual before she is a wife or a new member in the In-laws family. In-laws making her comfortable in the new family encourage her to appreciate the family members and vice-versa. My husband always provides me the space, which I deserve. As individuals, we are totally different to each other. Still, we are taking lovely efforts to understand deeply.

I think it is good to be different as an individual. In that way, you know the strength and weakness of each other. The reasons are simple:

New difference, new growth- Talking about the same topic will bring boredom at certain times. But, if you have two different topics, then you definitely share more knowledge. I like to talk about romances while my husband is too practical. Sometimes, it irritates me, but later on his practical knowledge helps me to take strong decisions for myself and my dreams.

Opposite attraction is strong- Difference in view leads to conflicts. The question is not who wins, but how we meet these challenges and get success in our relationship. Each day brings something new in our relationship. Certainly, attraction of opposite personalities always works. (Well, god’s grace it is working in my case.)

Balance in married life- Understanding in married life come if you understand your partner. I am a girl with too much life, friendly, energetic, impatient and great dreamer. Well, my compatible husband is calm, patient and practical. Initially, it takes time for us to understand each other. But now, that we know each other’s persona we are in a magical journey called MARRIAGE.

In the matter of values, we are like-minded people who live simple life with a positive outlook. Now, whenever there are any differences between us, we are clear to sort the problems sooner.